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There have been moments in my marriage when I have felt completely done, and over our more than thirty years together there have been times when I have said the words, “I’m leaving.” In those moments, I meant it. Whatever was happening between us had become so painful or overwhelming that leaving felt like the […]

I didn’t understand at the time that becoming hard of hearing would change the way I listened. A number of years ago, while completing my practicum to become a therapist, I lost a significant amount of my hearing. The timing felt almost absurd. I was learning how to sit with people, create safety, remain present […]

When Two People Experience Love Differently One of the more painful things that can happen in a neurodivergent relationship is that two people can genuinely love one another, care deeply about each other and be making meaningful efforts to show that love, while one or both people still feel profoundly unloved. This can be incredibly […]

I once worked with a couple where one partner, who is autistic, said something in session that has stayed with me ever since. She looked at her husband and said, “I never doubt that you love me because you tell me. You don’t make me guess.” Her husband looked surprised because he had always believed […]

Over the past few years, my clinical practice has shifted significantly. Increasingly, I find myself working with couples where one or both partners identify as neurodivergent, autistic, ADHD, or AuDHD. While every relationship has its own history, attachment experiences, personalities, and unique challenges, I continue to notice similar relational patterns across these couples. One pattern […]